Episode 015: Relating to Your Friends~ Part 2: Friendship Makers

Ever wonder what makes or breaks a relationship?  We need to pay attention to our mouth, mind and mannerisms while noticing what positive behaviors we enjoy the most done to us and what positive behaviors we tend to do to others.  What behavior will you commit to doing more of today?


“Art thou lonely, O my brother?  Share thy little with another.  Stretch a hand to one unfriended, and thy loneliness is ended.”   ~ John Oxenham


Show Notes:

Friendship Makers:

This week, consider the following actions that will help you build more healthy relationships with your friends.

A. Mouth

  1. Use your ‘yes’ and your ‘no’.  Knowing what you like or don’t like will help you choose your ‘yes’ and your ‘no’.
  2. Know your love language; inquire of your friend’s love language- gifts, quality time, etc;  www.5lovelanguages.com  by: Gary Chapman
  3. Invite your friend to speak into your life in truth and grace.  Be available to speak into your friend’s life with truth and grace.
  4. Offer respect to your friend.  Accept respect from your friend.
  5.  Share with your friend what is helpful in your life.
  6.  Receive your friend’s permission before offering her advice.  Speak to her dignity before speaking to her depravity.

Luke 6:36;  Prov 18:21;  Eph 4:31-32;  Matt 5:37;  Matt 7:12;  I Pet 2:17

B. Mind-

  1. Give and receive pearls.  This exchange is important and it’s good and healthy to have ‘big pearl friends’ and ‘small pearl friends’.
  2. Hold your friend’s story (receive it as a gift) and offer reflective listening to your friend.
  3. Assume the best about your friend and that she is doing the best she can do.
  4. Be positive in your life and in your friend’s life.
  5. Be kind to yourself and to your friend.  Encourage your friend to be kind to herself.

Prov 24:17;  Phil 4:8;  I Pet 3:9;  Prov 31:8Prov 11:16-17;  Prov 16:24

C. Manners-

  1. Be healthy- physically, mentally, emotionally, & spiritually.
  2. Encourage your friend towards health- physically, mentally, emotionally, & spiritually.
  3. Let your friend know ‘she’s got this’.
  4. Be willing to learn from your friend.  Be equal in your sharing & listening and in your  giving & taking.
  5. Be dependable.
  6. Be self-confident.  This is an attractive characteristic in any friend and is hopefully contagious.  Being in the company of self-confident friends will help increase your personal confidence.
  7. Remember to play.  Playful friends enjoy life, handle challenges in positive ways, and keep negative experiences in perspective.
  8. Be responsible to care for yourself; also walk alongside your friend and care for her, in an interdependent way.
  9. Be supportive of your friend in both the good and bad times.
  10. Bring God into your friendship.

Luke 16:10-12;  I Pet 2:5;  John 16:24;  Matt 10:8;  Gal 5:22-23;  Phil 2:4;  Prov 27:9;
Prov 18:24;  Heb 10:24-25;  Prov 27:17

In Conclusion~
Consider the following questions for each of the 3 categories above: Mouth, Mind, Manners:

  • Which of the following do you like the most/least when done to you?
  • Which of the following do you tend to do to others?
  • Which will you ask others to begin doing with you?
  • Which will you commit to begin doing for others?

Keep in mind that friendships change over time.  This is normal and OK.  Challenge yourself and be more aware of how you can be a healthier friend.